What Gary Chapman taught me about love

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Like all young people, i never imagined that it would be necessary to study how to build a successful relationship. I believed that passion would always be eternal and finding the right person was a matter of time. But like any young man, I (probably) was wrong.

I have always been a person who sought to delve into various topics, thank God I had the idea of ​​trying to learn more about this subject.

Okay, i’m kidding. But there are several myths about relationships.

Since I was a kid, i always heard about the “soul mate”, supposed person who would be perfect in every way for you, who would live the rest of your life with you. What i learned is that there is no such thing as a perfect person, not even you are perfect! There is no right or wrong person, there is no person that God created specifically for me. The right person is the one i chose and choose every day to stay by her side, wanting to grow and build a life together.

The greatest proof of this are several couples who are totally different. Even so, they love each other, are faithful and are together until today. If your partner is different from you, it’s not a problem, it’s an opportunity to get even closer to him.

“Is it possible for emotional love to be reborn in a marriage? You bet! The key is to learn your spouse’s first love language and decide to use it. ”

Does he like Asian culture? Great! How about asking him to introduce you to the culture? Or go out for sushi for the first time? The difference is never a problem, it is an opportunity to become more intimate with your spouse.

In the books, Gary Chapman has always told several stories, among them of people who love their partners, but they do not feel loved. Why?

Because everyone has their own way of feeling loved. According to the author, there are five languages ​​of love, they are:

Words of affimartion: Praise, incentives. Appreciate your spouse, speak well about the hair, the clothes. He/she will love it.

Acts of service: Serve your loved one, wash the dishes, sweep the floor. Whoever has this language loves to see their spouse doing this.

Quality time: Spending time giving total attention to others, talking, walking. Turn off the TV and put the phone down, focus on your partner.

Receiving gifts: As the name says, the person loves to receive gifts. No matter what the price, what matters is that you remembered the person.

Physical touch: Hugs, caresses, kisses. Physical touches that the person likes.

It is very important to understand these five languages ​​and see which one fits in your partner.

Having a person by your side that you love and admire is amazing. You will hardly find a problem that cannot be solved. Even a boring habit, through dialogue and patience, everything can be resolved, love is a journey where both walk together. You are together to evolve, to mature and help each other, as a person and as a couple.

And even with the daily difficulties, what matters is that you are together.

“The requests direct the love, but charges prevent it from being released.”

I have listed here some points that are essential for me to understand more about this incredible phenomenon that we call love. If you want to go deeper into this topic, I strongly recommend Gary Chapman’s five love languagens.

I hope this text has helped you to understand more about love. I believe it is essential for every human being to learn more about loving relationships, it is a very important area in your life!

And i’m learning English. So, sorry for any mistake!